. all rights belong to Tanis Harms –
. refer to www.church-skits.com
QUARRELSOME QUARTERS - written by Tanis Harms
TOPIC: arguing, nagging, selflessness, relationships
SCRIPTURE: Prov.19:13, 21:9, 26:21, Matt.7:12,
. 1Cor.13:5, 1 Tim.3:3
Style: drama/conversation: a counselor gets a couple
. to try treating each other like they
. themselves would want to be treated
Cast: HUSBAND, WIFE, COUNSELOR
Set & Props: 3 chairs
(ALL enter and sit down.)
COUNSELOR So how is married life?
HUSBAND Not so good.
WIFE Obviously, he has problems –
. why’d you think we’re here?
HUSBAND I have problems?
. You are the problem, babe!
COUNSELOR Wouldn't you agree –
. that you BOTH have problems?
(HUSBAND and WIFE eye each other competitively.)
HUSBAND I would be fine if she didn’t nag
. all the time.
WIFE (gasps) And I wouldn’t have to nag,
. if you’d pull your weight around the house.
HUSBAND I work very hard – at wooorrrrk.
. What do you do?
WIFE What do I do? I do everything else –
. that’s more than what you do.
COUNSELOR Okay-okay. Speaking of work –
. how’s this all working for you?
WIFE It’s not. 2
COUNSELOR Would you say that the problem
. is the division of the workload?
HUSBAND I would say if she’d not always be
. on my case all the time –
WIFE “Always” and “all the time”
. is the same thing - duh.
. When you overemphasize, you become redundant
. and thus become negative.
HUSBAND You’re redundant!
. You’re always correcting me.
COUNSELOR Whoa! Why don’t we try some role-playing?
. You know, switch roles. You be your wife,
. and you be your husband. (to WIFE) Okay?
. So - you’ve just come home from work...
WIFE Hey! Where’s supper!
HUSBAND I refuse to make supper.
. I had a very busy day spending
. all your hard-earned money
. going to the spa and doing my nails –
(COUNSELOR puts a weary hand to his head.)
WIFE I do not just do that!
. We have 4 children, and they cost money!
COUNSELOR Okay. Clearly this is not working.
HUSBAND You think!
WIFE See how insensitive he is?!
COUNSELOR Do you know what I think? I think
. you both just love to fight,
. and be contentious. Both of you nag.
. And you nag just to start up a fight.
. And then you fight to win.
. But what do you exactly win?
WIFE The - argument.
COUNSELOR What is the point? What is the payoff?
. Really, what - do you get out of it?
COUNSELOR You’re controlling nothing,
. especially yourself.
. Now, if you would get along –
. then you'd both win.
WIFE How in the world would we try
. to – get along?
COUNSELOR Try this: stop being selfish –
. try being selfLESS.
. Put the other person and their feelings first.
HUSBAND But then she’ll just get her way.
COUNSELOR (to HUSBAND) Forget about getting YOUR way.
. (to WIFE) Or YOUR way.
. You need to figure out
. THE way you will both be happy.
. If you BOTH work on that,
. you will BOTH be happy.
HUSBAND (doubtful) O-kaayyy, and WHEN
. we put the other person FIRST,
. how do we know exactly what to do?
COUNSELOR You know the Golden Rule?
. Do to others what you
. would have them do to you... Think about,
. "How would I like to be treated?"
. And then do THAT for the other person.
. EXAMPLE: You come home after work,
. and you want the house neat,
. but it isn't. Your wife is STILL working.
. If you were HER, what would YOU want?
HUSBAND I'd - want the other person
. to help me out a bit.
(HUSBAND and WIFE look at each other.)
WIFE Huh! It’s so crazy it just might work.
HUSBAND SOUNDS easy enough.
COUNSELOR You’ve had many years to reinforce
. what you’ve been doing thus far.
. Don’t rely on your first gut response
. for a while. Think before acting.
. And don’t forget to pray!
. This wooonn’t be easy.
. This will take LOTS of prayer –
. and LOTS of practice.
(WIFE and HUSBAND get up to leave.)
HUSBAND (to COUNSELOR) Thank you.
. (to WIFE) After you.
WIFE No, after you.
HUSBAND Noooo, I insist –
COUNSELOR It’s still not a competition.
(COUNSELOR slaps forehead in frustration and pushes
the two out.)