. except for the original drama portions taken from movies,
. all rights belong to Tanis Harms –
. refer to www.church-skits.com
NEW MOVIE ENDINGS - written by Tanis Harms
TOPIC: relationships, obeying God
SCRIPTURE: Ephesians 4:17-32
Style: satire/spoof on the famous scenes taken
. from Romeo and Juliet, Gone With the Wind,
. Casablanca, and Spiderman: I have given
. all 4 famous drama excerpts different endings
. using Christian principals.
Cast: Narrator, one couple (or 4 couples)
Set & Props: music, costumes-optional
NARRATOR If Biblical principles and unconditional love
. had been applied to the following relationships,
. perhaps these dramas would have ended
. much differently.
(Music with a few bars of some harpsichord music plays
as ROMEO enters in a sad disposition.)
ROMEO He jests at scars that never felt a wound.
(JULIET wanders on, striking a pose. ROMEO sees her.)
ROMEO But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
. It is the east and Juliet is the sun!
. Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,
. Who is already sick and pale with grief
. That thou her maid art far more fair than she.
. Be not her maid, since she is envious;
. Her vestal livery is but sick and green,
. And none but fools do wear it. Cast it off.
. It is my lady, O, it is my love!
. O that she knew she were!
(JULIET starts to subtly pace, processing something, like
she’s holding a mock conversation with maybe her parents.)
ROMEO She speaks, yet she says nothing; what of that?
(JULIET seems to pause to look at ROMEO, still processing.)
ROMEO Her eye discourses, I will answer it.
(JULIET turns now and looks up to the sky to think.)
ROMEO I am too bold: 'tis not to me she speaks.
. Two of the fairest stars in all the heaven,
. Having some business, do entreat her eyes
. To twinkle in their spheres till they return.
. What if her eyes were there, they in her head?
. The brightness of her cheek
. would shame those stars,
. As daylight doth a lamp. Her eyes in heaven
. Would through the airy region stream so bright
. That birds would sing and think it were not night.
(JULIET sighs, folds in her arms and strokes her cheeks as
if to calm herself as she continues to ponder her dilemma.)
ROMEO See how she leans her cheek upon her hand
. O that I were a glove upon that hand,
. That I might touch that cheek!
JULIET (sighing her frustration) Ay me!
ROMEO She speaks.
. O, speak again, bright angel, for thou art
. As glorious to this night, being o'er my head,
. As is a winged messenger of heaven
. Unto the white-upturned wondering eyes
. Of mortals that fall back to gaze on him
. When he bestrides the lazy-puffing clouds
. And sails upon the bosom of the air.
JULIET O Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?
. Deny thy father and refuse thy name;
. Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love,
. And I'll no longer be a Capulet.
ROMEO (aside, wondering) Shall I hear more,
. or shall I speak at this?
JULIET 'Tis but thy name that is my enemy:
. Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.
. What's Montague? It is nor hand, nor foot,
. Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part
. Belonging to a man. O, be some other name.
. What's in a name? That which we call a rose
. By any other name would smell as sweet;
. So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd,
. Retain that dear perfection which he owes
. Without that title. Romeo, doff thy name,
. And for that name, which is no part of thee,
. Take all myself.
ROMEO I take thee at thy word.
. Call me but love, and I'll be new baptis'd;
. Henceforth I never will be Romeo.
JULIET What man art thou that, thus bescreened in night,
. So stumblest on my counsel?
ROMEO By a name
. I know not how to tell thee who I am:
. My name, dear saint, is hateful to myself,
. Because it is an enemy to thee.
. Had I it written, I would tear the word.
JULIET My ears have yet not drunk a hundred words
. Of thy tongue's uttering, yet I know the sound.
. Art thou not Romeo, and a Montague?
ROMEO Neither, fair saint, if either thee dislike.
JULIET How cam'st thou hither, tell me, and wherefore?
. The orchard walls are high and hard to climb,
. And the place death, considering who thou art,
. If any of my kinsmen find thee here.
ROMEO With love's light wings
. did I o'erperch these walls,
. For stony limits cannot hold love out,
. And what love can do, that dares love attempt:
. Therefore thy kinsmen are no stop to me.
JULIET If they do see thee, they will murder thee.
ROMEO Alack, there lies more peril in thine eye
. Than twenty of their swords. Look thou but sweet
. And I am proof against their enmity.
JULIET I would not for the world they saw thee here.
ROMEO I have night's cloak to hide me from their eyes,
. And, but thou love me, let them find me here;
. My life were better ended by their hate
. Than death prorogued, wanting of thy love.
JULIET Tis not the rational thinking I actually
. desire to hear. Must it come to death
. before some alternate course of action?
. Me thinks - seeking out wise counsel perhaps?
ROMEO And prolong the agony that we both feel?
JULIET Why rusheth into thus so hastily?
. Perchance, I could driveth you crazy.
. I am nary as perfect as you just described.
. Now let us part ways until such a time
. which is sensible. We will then sort this out.
ROMEO Lady, by yonder blessed moon I vow,
. That we will help our families reconcile-
JULIET O, swear not by the moon, the inconstant moon,
. That monthly changes in her circled orb,
. Lest that thy love prove likewise variable.
ROMEO What shall I swear by?
JULIET Do not swear at all. Rather, let us pray on this.
. And if your heart is not in such a place,
. you are not the man for me. Good night.
(JULIET turns and exits. ROMEO is left to reflectively
ROMEO Indeed. The exchange of love's wisdom
. does evoke a call to common sense.
(ROMEO exits with new determination.
Music of “Gone With the Wind” plays as SECOND COUPLE enters
or same couple puts on appropriate hats or costume bits.
SCARLETT runs after RHETT. He stops to look at her.)
RHETT Scarlett, Melanie, she’s? – God rest her-
. She was the only completely
. kind person I ever knew. Great lady.
. A very great lady. Though she’s dead.
. That makes it nice for you, doesn’t it?
SCARLETT Oh, how can you say such things.
. You know how I loved her really.
RHETT No, I don’t know that I do.
. But at least it’s to your credit that
. you could appreciate her at the end.
SCARLETT Of course I appreciated her.
. She thought of everybody except herself.
. Why her last words were about you.
RHETT What did she say? 5
SCARLETT She said, be kind to Captain Butler,
. he loves you so.
RHETT Did she say anything else?
. Did she give you permission
. to take care of her husband?
. The one you have loved
. in your heart all these years?
. I’m leaving you, my dear.
. All you need now is a divorce and
. your dreams of Ashley can come true.
SCARLETT No! No, you’re wrong! Terribly wrong!
. I don’t want a divorce. Oh Rhett,
. when I knew tonight, when I knew I loved you,
. I ran home to tell you, oh darling, darling!
RHETT Please don’t go on with this.
. Leave us some dignity to remember
. out of our marriage. Spare us this last.
SCARLETT This last? Oh Rhett, do listen to me.
. I must have loved you for years
. only I was such a stupid fool, I didn’t know it.
. Please believe me. You must care!
RHETT I believe you.
. But what about Ashley Wilkes?
SCARLETT I... I never really loved Ashley.
RHETT You certainly gave a good imitation of it
. up to this morning.
. Oh, Scarlett, I tried everything.
. If you’d only met me halfway,
. even when I came back from London...
SCARLETT I was so glad to see you, I was Rhett,
. but, but you were so nasty!
RHETT And then when you were sick.
. And it was all my fault. Even though
. you fell down the stairs because you went
. to slap me. I hoped and against hope
. that you’d call for me. But you didn’t.
SCARLETT I wanted you. I wanted you desperately,
. but I didn’t think you wanted me.
RHETT Seems we’ve been at crossed purposed,
. doesn’t it. But it’s no use now.
. My darling, you’re such a child.
. You’d think by saying I’m sorry,
. all the past can be corrected.
. Here, take my handkerchief.
. Never in any crisis of your life
. have I known you to have a handkerchief.
(RHETT tries to leave. SCARLETT holds him back.)
SCARLETT Please, please take me with you.
. I only know that I love you.
(RHETT stops, thinks, then looks at SCARLETT solemnly.)
RHETT Frankly my dear, I don’t –
. give a care how much you’ve hurt me.
. I will – with God’s help – forgive you.
. It will take some time, though,
. and a lot of counseling,
. but I know we can work it out.
SCARLETT Oh yes, Rhett, after all,
. tomorrow is another day!
(RHETT and SCARLETT exits. Music of Casablanca’s
“A Kiss is Just a Kiss” plays as THIRD COUPLE enters
or same couple puts on different hats/costume bits.)
RICK I had the names Mr. and Mrs. Victor Laszlo
. put on these VISAs.
ILSA But why my name, Richard?
RICK Because you’re getting on that plane.
ILSA (confused) I don’t understand.
. What about you?
RICK I’m staying here ‘til the plane
. gets safely away.
ILSA (realizing) No, Richard, no.
. What has happened to you?
. Last night we said –
(ILSA tries hugging RICK, but RICK grabs her arms
and moves her away firmly but gently.)
RICK Last night we said a great many things.
. You said I was to do the thinking
. for both of us.
. Well, I’ve done a lot of it since then
. and it all adds up to one thing.
. You’re getting on that plane
. with your husband, Victor – where you belong.
ILSA (protesting) But Richard, no, I, I –
RICK Because it’s wrong, it wouldn’t work –
ILSA You’re saying this only to make me go.
RICK I’m saying it because it’s true.
. Inside of us we both know
. you belong with Victor.
. You only fell in love with me
. when you thought your husband was dead.
ILSA But you know I worshipped you.
RICK You worshipped me
. with a feeling you supposed was love.
. But it really wasn’t love.
. Once you heard Victor was alive,
. you went back to him, as you should have.
. And now, if that plane leaves the ground
. and you’re not with him, you’ll regret it.
RICK Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon,
. and for the rest of your life.
ILSA Well, we’ll always have Paris.
RICK Don’t even talk that way, Ilsa.
. Forget Paris.
. We must both forget Paris.
. Lusting over another time and another person-
. it’s nothing but trouble.
. It doesn’t take much to see,
. that these types of distractions
. don’t amount to a hill of beans
. in this crazy world.
. Someday you’ll understand that.
. You - must choose to love and remain faithful
. to your husband. And I must move on.
(ILSA starts to cry. RICK punches her softly on the chin.)
RICK Now, now, here’s looking at you, kid –
. in a – very - sisterly sort of way.
(ILSA rushes out. RICK saunters off in the other direction.
Music of “Spiderman” plays, while PETER PARKER mimes
coming in like he’s swinging on spider-threads right up
to MARY JANE. Or same couple changes hats/costume bits.)
M.J. Peter Parker? You’re - Spider-Man?
. Why couldn’t you tell me?
PETER Sometimes to do what’s right,
. we have to be steady,
. and give up the thing we want the most.
. Even our dreams. Our gifts
. are to be used for the good of mankind.
. It’s - a privilege.
M.J. I think I always knew-all this time–
. who you really were.
PETER Then you know why we can’t be together.
. Spider-Man will always have enemies.
. I can’t let you take that risk.
. I will – always be Spider-Man.
. You and I can never be. Mary Jane.
M.J. Peter, I can’t survive without you.
PETER That’s a little dramatic.
. Of course you can survive without me.
M.J. I know you think we can’t be together,
. but can’t you respect me enough
. to let me make my own decision?
. I know there’ll be risks,
. and I’m willing to take them.
. But I want to face them with you.
. And with God’s strength and protection,
. anything is possible.
. Isn’t it about time
. somebody saved your life?
PETER I’ve not been perfect.
. And in the future,
. I’m sure I’ll do some terrible things.
M.J. None of us are perfect. 9
. And there’s always forgiveness.
PETER You’re right. Whatever comes our way,
. whatever battle we have raging inside us,
. we always have a choice.
. It’s the choices that make us who we are.
. And we can always choose to do what’s right.
. But there are a lot of wrongs to make right.
M.J. –With God’s help!
. And some really good marital advice
. BEFORE we make any big decisions...
. Just because you’re Spider-Man,
. doesn’t mean it’s all up to you.
. You can’t change the world.
. You need to realize
. that God is in control, Peter,
. not you. Because, I can see
. you have work-a-holic tendency.
. You mean well, but you have to
. put everything into perspective,
. get your priorities straight,
. maintain a balanced life.
. You can only control the choices YOU make.
. If we get married,
. you cannot neglect our relationship,
. or our kids – if we have any...
. Well, say something.
PETER Thank you, Mary Jane Watson.
. (seeing something, and getting distracted)
. Now, ah, I see a purse-snatcher over there –
M.J. Go get them, tiger!...
. Just make sure you come right back.
(PETER spider-threads his way out.
MARY JANE waves and walks off.)