. all rights belong to Tanis Harms –
. refer to www.church-skits.com
FAST FOOD ORDERS – written by Tanis Harms
TOPIC: lifestyle attitudes
SCRIPTURE: Prov.23:1-35; Eph.4:31; Rom.12:19;
Style: allegory/conversation: people go to
. a fast food counter to place an order
. which determines their lifestyle choices
Cast: CLERK, PERSON 1-6
Set & Props: counter/booth or table, 5 paper bags
. made to look like there’s something in it
. and are rolled closed at the top.
. OPTIONAL: sign at booth/table saying
. “Fast Food with an Attitude”
. OPTIONAL: table and chairs for 5
. off to the side
(CLERK stands behind the counter waiting while
PERSONS 1-6 rush to get in line, and even though they
know each other, PERSON 1 pushes their way to the front.)
P 1 Out of my way! Me first!-Me first! Me-me-me-me!
CLERK Hi, welcome to Fast Food with an Attitude!
. You are what you eat! May I help you?
P 1 I want stuff. Lots of stuff!
. And I want to rub shoulders with the rich
. and the powerful. And I want it to go!
. Now! ASAP!
CLERK So you want an order of greed! Ah,
. I’m guess you want that to be with...
. a side of selfishness, arrogance and pride?
P 1 You got it! And heap on the ego!
CLERK It IS a big meal to handle.
. You do realize, you might be in for some
. indigestion... and by indigestion, I mean,
. stress - and ulcers - induced by
. high risk investments, misleading flattery,
. deception and backstabbing politics.
P 1 BRING – IT – ON!
CLERK Okaaay, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
(CLERK hands a bag to P 1, who has money ready.
P 1 goes to sit at the table or on the floor to the side.
As everyone goes to the table, they freeze, waiting.
P 2 immediately slides up to the counter.)
P 2 So, well, ahhh, I’m not sure – ahhhh...
(PERSON 3 pushes PERSON 2 out of the way.)
P 3 (rudely) While you decide, allow me!
P 2 You are the stupidest friend I’ve ever had.
P 3 Not as stupid as you!
P 2 I had a pet HAMSTER that was smarter than you.
P 3 I’ll get back at you later!
. (to CLERK) I - want - revenge!
CLERK That automatically comes with the toppings:
. impatience, anger, hatred, bitterness, and
(PERSON 3 holds out hand with money while speaking.)
P 3 Serve that up now, so I can dish it out later!
(While PERSON 3 keeps holding out hand,
CLERK pulls out a bag and makes the exchange.
PERSON 3 sits at table with arms crossed, angrily.
CLERK nods at PERSON 2.)
CLERK Are you ready to order yet?
P 2 Ahhh-
P 4 Dude!
P 2 GOOOO ahead. But you owe me.
(PERSON 4 almost dances up to the counter.)
P 4 I want the... the ahhhh, like WOW...
. like, WHERE to start?
CLERK Let me guess. You probably want –
. the party pack.
P 4 Dude! THAT is what I’m talking about!
(CLERK pulls out a bag and holds it out while talking.)
CLERK It starts with self-centeredness.
. Followed by addictions and laziness,
. then topped off with a dessert
. of poverty, leading to a life of crime.
P 5 Yeah! PAR-TAY!
(PERSON 5 reaches for the bag, but CLERK holds on tight.)
CLERK Dude. You owe ME.
P 5 Dude! I’ll catch you later. I mean, look at me.
. I am so fine. I’m totally worth it.
. (with a lower voice) Come on, be a pal.
CLERK This first one - is on the house.
. ‘Cause I know - you’ll be back for more.
P 5 THAT is what I’m talking about.
(PERSON 5 grabs the bag and goes to the table.
PERSON 2 finally steps up.)
CLERK You ready?
P 2 As I’ll ever be... I guess.
(PERSON 2 slowly steps closer to the counter.)
CLERK So, what are you in the mood for?
P 2 Ah, I really don’t want to strain myself
. too much. You know? I really would
. like to avoid any sort of work. Or
. any kind of deep thinking, for that matter.
CLERK So - an order of Foolishness! Oh – 4
. did you want negligence with that? May as well!
. And when you order two, you get
. lower expectations and less responsibilities.
P 2 Sure. Why not.
CLERK And as I know you do not care, I’ll throw in
. lots of complacency. It definitely compliments
. the flavor profile you’ve got going on.
P 2 Whatever!
(CLERK and PERSON 2 make the exchange and goes
to sit at the table, staring lamely off into space.
PERSON 5 steps up with a sly and brooding attitude.)
P 5 I’ll have - what – they are all having.
CLERK (confused) Ah, you mean the greed, the revenge,
. the – party pack - AND the foolishness-
P 5 Yeah, all of it! His, hers- whatever they have,
. I want it. Why can’t I have it all? Huh?
. Seriously, don’t leave me hanging.
CLERK Ohhhh, you want the Envy meal. And -
. I’ll serve that up extra green for you.
P 5 Sure, but – anytime – anytime there- anytime-
(PERSON 5 snaps the fingers to hurry CLERK along
to make the exchange. As P 5 goes to sit at table,
PERSON 6 steps up.)
CLERK Hi, welcome to Fast Food with an Attitude.
. You are going to be whatever it is you eat.
. So, what do you want?
P 6 I’m actually thinking – I want – wisdom.
. And love – love would be good. And ahhhh,
. with a side of truth? And for dessert,
. I think - contentment sounds really good.
CLERK Ohhhhh, we don’t serve anything like that here.
. You want the HEALTHY place over there-
. up the road a bit.
P 6 Oh, okay, thanks. Thanks anyway.
(PERSON 6 approaches the table where friends sit.
PERSONS 1-5 now open their bags and look in.
They shake their bags and find that nothing comes out.)
P 5 Emptiness???!
P 1 Yeah! I mean, no! MINE is full.
. Mine is REALLY full of stuff.
P 4 Not as full as mine!
P 2 Sooo, I’m just going to go enjoy all of this
. all by myself then.
P 3 Later dudes. I’ve got a party to go to.
(PERSONS 1-5 exit in one direction.
PERSON 6 thinks, then exits in the opposite direction.
CLERK looks at congregation.)
CLERK You are what you eat!