.           all rights belong to Tanis Harms –
.             refer to
www.church-skits.com

DAVID ON THE RUN - written by Tanis Harms
.            Could be done in the 3-skit-grouping:
.            "David as a Boy", "David on the Run", and
.            "David's Son's Search"
TOPIC:       God’s revenge, God gives us protection
SCRIPTURE:   1 Samuel 18:1 – 24:22
Style:       satire/spoof of highly dynamic cartoon:
.            in a classroom setting, a TEACHER gives
.            a visual lesson of DAVID on the run
.            from king SAUL
Cast:        Teacher, 3 girls, David, Saul, Samuel,
.            Jonathan, Man
.            (one person could be JON & MAN)
Set & Props: textbook with script in it for Teacher,
.            easel,
.            paper with words of rap/song,
.            3 chairs,
.            sweat band,
.            crown,
.            guitar,
.            scissors,
.            tiny piece of cloth

SCRIPT:

(On one side is the “classroom” where 3 GIRLS sit.
TEACHER approaches easel.)

TEACH     Hello class. My name is still... not important.

3 GIRLS   Good morning, Mrs. Not Important.

TEACH     Oh you girls!  Let’s review our history lesson
.         shall we?  Now, does anyone remember
.         how it went?

GIRL/S    (get up & dance, and do the “Fresh Prince” rap)
.         “Nooooow, this is the story all about how-

(DAVID comes in trying to dance cool.  GIRLS keep going.)

GIRLS     -A shepherd boy’s life turned upside down
.         And I’d like to take a minute just sit
.         right there, I’ll tell you how he became –
.         the king of – Is-ra-el”.

(GIRL/S sit back down.)
.                                                     2
TEACH     Very good.  So today’s history lesson is –
.         all about David on the run.

(DAVID ties a sweatband around his head and starts
running around the stage.)

TEACH     (to David)  No-no-no – not yet.  And that’s
.         not what I meant.  (David stops.)  Go back.
.         Go back to what you were doing.
.         (David begins to leave)  Remind me again
.         what you were doing?  Weren’t you a shepherd?

DAVID     (stops)  I just killed that sassy giant.

TEACH     Oh yes!  You just killed that sassy
.         giant named Goliath - which helped Israel
.         win the war against the Philistines.
.         And King Saul rewarded you.

(Meanwhile, SAUL comes out and shakes DAVID’s hand.
They smile and pose, freezing for the photo-op.)

TEACH     David got to live in the palace
.         and began working for King Saul.
.         There, David made very good friends with
.         the king’s son.  His name was Jonathan.

(Meanwhile, JON comes out and joins the photo shoot.
KING SAUL stands by jealously while DAVID and JON
put their arms on each other’s shoulders and pose manly,
freezing for the photo-op.)

TEACH     King Saul would send David away to lead
.         Israel’s army into battle.  And David always
.         came back winning the war.

(Meanwhile, SAUL points off into a couple of directions,
while DAVID puts his hands together above his head
in victory with a big smile, still in a photo shoot
but not freezing.)

GIRLS     King Saul once killed his thousands,
.         but David’s killed ten thousands and
.         ten thousands and ten thousands and -
.         woooo-eeeee love you David!!!

(SAUL gives the GIRLS a dirty look, then gives an evil,
jealous look at DAVID who still does his victory thing.
SAUL shakes angrily as he continues to scowl at DAVID)
.                                                     3
TEACH     There was another job that David had to do
.         for the king... Whenever an evil spirit
.         would come and torture Saul and make him
.         go crazy, to calm him down, David would play
.         beautiful music for him on the harp.

(DAVID glances over at SAUL and sees the rage.  JON runs
to get a guitar from guitar-hero and hand it to DAVID.)

DAVID     Dude, that’s not a harp.

JON       It’s guitar hero.  Just go with it.

(DAVID pretends to play.  SAUL struggles to calm down.)

TEACH     Usually, this would calm King Saul down.
.         But sometimes, he was just too angry,
.         and Saul would try to kill David.

SAUL      (ranting)  Where – is – my – spear?

TEACH     God always protected David, even though
.         Saul tried many different ways to have
.         David killed.

SAUL      David!  (collecting himself as DAVID answers)
.         In order to marry my daughter, I want you
.         to go and kill 100 enemies today
.         and bring me back the proof.

DAVID     Okay.

(DAVID exits with the guitar.  JON looks at SAUL.)

SAUL      Hee-hee-hee, when he tries to kill all those
.         enemies, DAVID will be killed instead
.         because they will be SOOOO angry!

(DAVID enters with a bag and throws it at SAUL’s feet.
SAUL is very angry. DAVID puts his arms up with victory.)

DAVID     Here you go.

GIRLS     King Saul once killed his thousands,
.         but David’s killed ten thousands and
.         ten thousands and ten thousands –
.         Woooo-eeeee love you David...

GIRL      Aw, he gets to marry the king’s daughter.
.                                                     4
(DAVID walks off waving and smiling.  SAUL looks at JON.)

SAUL     Jonathan – go and kill David.

JON      Naw-ah!  He hasn’t done anything wrong?

SAUL     Okay-okay. I’ll have his new wife help kill him.

(As the TEACHER speaks, SAUL looks around the audience.)

TEACH     Let’s cut to the chase shall we.
.         King Saul tried many times to kill David,
.         even though David didn’t do - anything wrong.
.         David would pray and ask God for guidance,
.         then he would go where God told him –
.         and Saul would chase him.  And everywhere
.         King Saul went, he would hear the people sing
.         about David...

SAUL      (to GIRLS)  Have you girls seen David
.         around here?

GIRLS     Oooo David? (go into their cheer)
.         King Saul once killed his thousands,
.         but David’s killed ten thousands –
.         and ten thou-

SAUL      You HAVE seen him, haven’t you! Hmmmm.

(GIRLS clamp their mouths shut. SAUL looks around.)

GIRL      (waving arms around)  You saw nothing!

(As TEACHER names off the places of escape, DAVID & MAN
move to different spots, then SAUL moves a “step” behind
and shields his eyes to look around for signs, etc.)

TEACH     David escaped again with 400 men.
.         First they went to Adullam,
.         then to the forest of Hereth, then to Keilah –
.         then the wilderness of Ziph – aaaannd –
.         blah blah BLAAAH – and FINALLY –
.         to the wilderness of Engedi...(sighs)
.         and THERE he hid in a cave.
.         And King Saul and his army chased him.

(DAVID & MAN crouch in one spot.  SAUL reaches the spot,
tired, and waving his hand at his face to cool off.)

TEACH     Being hot and needing some cool shade,      5
.         King Saul went into the very cave
.         that David and all his men were hiding.

(SAUL ducks low and then sits down.  DAVID and MAN sit
very close by.)

TEACH     Oh, and the cave was very dark so SAUL –
.         did not see David right there.

(SAUL yawns and falls asleep.)

MAN       Check it out, you have your chance for revenge.

DAVID     You’re – right.  Hand me my knife.

(MAN holds out a pair of scissors.  DAVID takes it and
looks at it.)

DAVID     Dude, have these been invented yet?

MAN       Scissors!  Just go with it –
.         and TAKE your revenge.

(DAVID pretends to cut a piece of clothing off of SAUL.
Once he has it, DAVID holds it up for the MAN to see.)

MAN       Okay, I was thinking of something a little more
.         extreme than – just cutting off a piece
.         of his clothes.

DAVID     THIS will show him - that I was close enough
.         to kill him - but I chose NOT to.

MAN       (mockingly scary)  Oooo.

DAVID     Sh.

(DAVID pulls the man back as SAUL wakes up, stretches
then starts to walk away.  They freeze in this position.)

TEACH     Now, David started to feel guilty about cutting
.         King Saul’s robe like that.  This was NOT
.         showing respect for authority.

(They unfreeze.  DAVID steps forward.)

DAVID     Listen up, King Saul.  (SAUL turns)  You think
.         that I am trying to kill you, but here is proof
.         that I am NOT trying to kill you.
.                                                     6
(DAVID holds up the piece of cloth that matches
SAUL’s clothes.  SAUL quickly looks at his own clothes.
Pretending to find a missing piece, he gets angry.)

DAVID     I will let God judge you and take revenge
.         FOR me.  So even if you try to hurt me,
.         I will NOT try to hurt YOU.

(SAUL balks in fear, then pretends to be nice and humble,
but it is exaggerated and very obviously fake humility.)

SAUL      David, buddy ol’ pal.  You - are right and -
.         I've been very, very wrong.  And one day –
.         when you are king of Israel - after ME,
.         please – please – please – please -
.         promise me – be kind to my family.

MAN       Dude, he’s totally faking that nice-stuff.

DAVID     (aside to Man)  Doesn’t matter.  It’s not
.         his children’s fault that he’s so nasty.
.         (to Saul) I promise to be nice to your family.

(SAUL exits first.  Then MAN and DAVID leave.)

GIRLS     (sigh)  David is so awesome.

TEACH     And so, David did NOT try to take revenge,
.         but trusted God for protection,
.         because who is stronger and mightier than God?

GIRLS     Oh, no one is.  GOD is way awesome-er!